Friday, April 07, 2006

cursory concern

"hey."
"sup."
"life sux man... my girlfriend is giving me trouble."
"geez... poor you."
"it was only making eyes at some babe across the street. what's the big deal really?"
"yeah."
"she does that with cute guys, so i'm entitled!"
"mm hmm."
"not like i'm gonna go pick that girl up or something, you know."
"nah."
"ogling is perfectly normal practice among guys."
"i guess."
"i'm just being a normal guy."
"of course."
"so it's her being oversensitive! girls..."
"tsk tsk."
"dude, thanks so much for clarifying with me!"
"sure, anytime."

and so girlfriend-trouble guy goes on ogling. what do you think will happen to his relationship?

there is a socially imposed requirement to "care for others", even when one does not really feel like it. when someone requests for small acts of concern, it is duly given out of obligation, and the requestor is thus placated patronisingly. what then, is the point of such cursory concern?

to the cursor's benefit, not everyone is in the right mood or mode to give advice or listen. it's a tough life and everyone is busy dealing with their private sorrows. isn't it good enough that i bother to listen? unfortunately, it may result in further sorrow, where concern turns sour. what if you received cursory concern? the cursor, so long as such response is doled out consistently with no explanation or disclaimer, is not in benefit but ought review such lack of responsibility.

to the requestor's deficit, most problems ought to be dealt with personally. or should they? why are we a society if we are supposed to feel so alone? if we are capable of social relations, why not make the most of it? the requestor, so long as the requesting is genuine, is not in deficit although greater caution should be taken when approaching others for advice. yet, such stability of thought may not be present, so greater onus rests on the acceptor to be attentive.

are you guilty of cursory concern? or have you been a victim?

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